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The allure of a dark room lies in its lighting – it should be dark, but not too dark. Ideally, you wont recognise the cashier from your local Tesco Metro, but you will be able to make out a sweaty throng of bodies in positions youd normally only see on OnlyFans. Dark rooms have been a draw in queer spaces for decades and remain de rigueur in other, friskier parts of Europe. Put it this way: Its a rookie error to wear your best shoes to Berlin’s famously bohemian superclub Berghain, because youll just have to chuck them away after you leave seven hours later.
But now, dark rooms are enjoying a long overdue boom in the UK, especially among MSM (men who have sex with men). Essentially, the reason theyre becoming popular again is a supply and demand issue, says Ian Howley, CEO of health and wellbeing charity LGBT HERO. Gay men want a place where they can have fun, and a dark room in a club can be the matchless place to let go of your inhibitions and be sexually free.
This new wave of queer sex-positivity is being fuelled partly by post-pandemic carpe diem
'I was chatting to a straight, married man on a gay dating site.'
“Oh nah, I’m vertical, I just fond of playing around with guys sometimes.”
A couple of months ago, a month or so out of a relationship, I returned to that great African savannah of sexuality otherwise known as Grindr. Perhaps a queer friend has shown you it. It’s like Tinder for gay men, though while at times the approaches appear with a directness, and obnoxiousness that would make Donald Trump blush.
I was once asked out of the cobalt “Would you please do a poo on me NOW.”
Lordy, lordy. For the record, in the same way that some guys on Tinder are friggin horrible, gay platforms like Grindr can be as unpleasant or as rewarding as you produce them. I’ve met multiple long-term partners boyfriends on there, and most of the chaps on there are relatively civilised, of course the gentleman don’t stand out as much as those who puts their kinks on exhibit and ask you to share your breakfast with them at dinner time.
I digress. I’d been chatting to a gentleman, let’s summon him David, for a few weeks and we resolved to cat
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Your results will initially appear with the most closely comparable word shown first, the second-most clI’m not convinced women who are on Tinder who say “no hookups” actually mean that.
First of all, Tinder is for fresh people and young women don’t have a strenuous time meeting men in real life. So, for someone to go to a place that is known to be where casual sex seekers face and announce THEY aren’t at all interested in casual sex seems fishy. If I’m not in the market to acquire shag carpeting that’s packed of vomit and fleas, I don’t go shopping at the used carpet store that specializes in shag carpeting that’s complete of vomit and fleas. I certainly don’t proceed there and ask where I can find silk hand-knotted rugs from Main Persia for basically the same price and acquire offended when I’m offered vomit and fleas.
More likely, these women are interested in hooking up (or at least open to some opportunities of it happening) but don’t yearn their friends and colleagues knowing this should someone come across their profile, so like the Playboy readers who buy the magazine for the articles, these women are on Tinder “just for the lulz.”
Which brings me to my second point: Despite their loud claims,